Bonus Fiction: The Extra-Curricular Course Catalog

Taking the Fictionistas January story prompt back to school

This short story is part of the Fictionistas' January Let’s Write Together Prompt Party. Thanks to them for facilitating it.

Fictionistas Prompt. January 2025

• MAGNIFY: Up close, everything looks different. Zoom in to focus on a moment, a detail, or an emotion.

• THAT WAS LUCKY: Let your hero succeed through pure dumb luck. Just make sure the pendulum swings both ways.

• FIGHT THE GIANT: Your hero will have to face her adversary at some point. Why not now?

By Vince Wetzel

Copyright Vince Wetzel and OT Press

I had never been this close to her before, so close that I’d never seen that mole before. The brown dot was just below her lower right eyelashes, but it was completely her.

We had just finished, and we were all smiles and heavy breathing, trying to recover from the 20 minutes of yoga and cardio that accompanied our lovemaking. Or was it sex? Or was it fucking? It was only my second time, and I wasn’t sure about the parameters of classification.

As a first-year Biomed student, I was all about the physical sciences. I could study every inch of Tiza and pass all my classes.

Anatomy. In our time together, we explored every piece of the other’s body. Besides her mole, I examined and rubbed every curve, crevice, nape, hair follicle, and reproductive organ so well I could draw Michelangelo’s “Canon Proportions” sketch of Tiza’s form. While I didn’t know Tiza’s talent for sketching, I was sure she could do the same.

Biology. Well, that was easy. We just performed an experiment with the human reproduction system. There were the gametes produced by males and females and the possible fertilization of the egg by the sperm. In the event of fertilization, there would be cell divisions, genetics, pregnancy, and fetal development.

Chemistry. Our interlude was so quick that we relied on the chemistry of her birth control to disrupt the hormonal cycle. Her brain chemistry also created desire, and I was at the right place at the right time. One could say that we also had instant chemistry. The moment she walked into my room, our pheromones created a hormonal reaction.

Math. I knew my roommate was off to the gymnasium to play pickup basketball with a few of his friends. Based on my knowledge of his previous activity, that meant he would be gone for three hours. However, when I looked at the clock, he had only been gone ninety minutes, leaving another hour before he was likely to be expected back. If my calculations were correct, then there would be plenty of time for Tiza and me to have another round.

Ethics. The fact that Tiza was my roommate’s girlfriend could mean a failing grade. After all, I understood that this could complicate my relationship with Donald and might doom any relationship with Tiza in the future. But I wasn’t going to kick her out at this moment because of the possible uncomfortable situation.

Kinesiology. I should have considered the threat to human ankles when someone as large as my roommate plays basketball. At 6 feet 4 inches and 250 pounds, Donald is a giant, but when he returned to the room ninety minutes early, hobbling on one ankle, I understood my miscalculation.

Physics. When he unlocked the door, Tiza pulled the covers over her head, thinking avoidance was the answer. But invisibility is impossible in the eyes of physics, and it didn’t take more than a split second for him to understand the betrayal in which Tiza and I had engaged. Donald’s pain and fatigue turned to rage, and the shots of natural adrenaline entered his bloodstream. Despite his ankle, the unstoppable force of his fists and the immovable object of his body made facing him inevitable, and it was going to be painful.

While I was disappointed with the number of general education requirements I had to take in college, I realized I also needed to apply some of those lessons.

Interpersonal Communication. I used a calming voice and put my hands out in an open gesture, expressing nonverbal communication to welcome open dialogue. I knew that gaslighting him would only make him angrier, so I shared how I was wrong and apologized for the betrayal. It didn’t work, or he wasn’t listening. He was the bull, and I was the china shop.

Critical Thinking and Logic. Yes, adrenaline was pumping through his veins, but he was still larger and slower than I was, and he still had a sprained ankle. He wasn’t interested in sparring with me. He was looking to knock my head off of my neck. If I could avoid that first punch, then I could skirt around him and get out the door.

Health and Wellness. While my plan was sound, its execution wasn’t. I didn’t expect a second punch to come as soon after the first and, therefore, was knocked to the ground. When I closed my right eye to avoid watching the collision with his fist, I felt a dull ache, followed by swelling. I didn’t open it again. I was spared more injuries from Donald as his friends quickly secured him and pulled him back out of the room, enough time for Tiza and I to put on our clothes and leave the room. She took me to the campus health center, where they treated my swollen eye.

Psychology. While Tiza felt guilty about my injury, our relationship was destined to fail. She had been dating Donald for four months, but she had cheated on him three times. I was the only one with whom she was caught. She said she didn’t want to be monogamous, but she also didn’t know how to not be in a relationship. Understanding that psychology went beyond the scope of this syllabus.

English Composition. The Resident Assistant, a sociology major, asked me to write a letter of apology to Donald. The RA said this was as much about me taking responsibility as it was about seeking forgiveness. I admit. I understood how much I had erred in this practical education.

Technology and Information Literacy. It took more than a week for me to use the online housing portal to find a roommate to take me in. It turns out that no one thinks a guy who slept with their roommate’s girlfriend is ideal roommate material. I am also seeking a transfer to another university to continue my studies.

Want more bonus fiction?

Flash Fiction is a great exercise for creativity. Taking a prompt and having to write about it helps me avoid writer’s block. Participating in these prompt parties also allows me to experiment with genre, style, and more.

To read other Bonus Fiction, check out my Flash Fiction section of the Substack.

If you’re tasting the Salted Wetzel for the first time…

Welcome! My name is Vince Wetzel. I’m the author of two novels and write this weekly Substack, which includes fiction, fridge philosophies, interviews with other authors, and more. Enjoy, and be sure to subscribe to stay up to date.