Forever in Our Hearts

Short Fiction: A Father Remembers His Son at a Joyous Wedding

This is Part 4 in a short four-part fictional series Wedding Bells, sharing the celebration of marriage between Paul Buckley and Tracey Jenson.

By Vince Wetzel

Copyright Vince Wetzel and OT Press 

I knew Paul and Tracey were dating, but I didn’t realize it was that serious until I opened the voicemail on my phone.

“Hey Kevin, it’s Tracey,” the voicemail began. My late son’s widow’s voice still sounded as fresh as it did when I first met her nearly 20 years ago. But with Will now in high school, Tracey’s calls for me to babysit my grandson were more infrequent. But there was always hope that maybe I could take him to lunch or dinner to catch up.

“I’ve got some great news,” Tracey continued, and I grabbed the kitchen counter. “Paul asked me to marry him, and I said, ‘Yes.’”

This news raised my level of anxiety. I was unprepared, and more than a little bit upset that she decided to leave this news on my voicemail. I could hardly concentrate as Tracey described how Paul had proposed and that the wedding would be in October. Instead of being joyful, I was wrapping my head around the fact that my daughter-in-law was getting a new husband.

“I know this has to be weird for you and all. But I think you know how much Jim still remains in my heart. And you also know how much Paul has been there for me since Jim’s death. I think Jim would be ok with this and I hope you are too. Please call me.”

I moved to the couch and stared at the dark TV. I knew this day was coming. It was unrealistic to believe that Tracey would remain a widow and not find another partner for the rest of her life. After all, it had been nearly eight years since Jim had died tragically in a car accident.

And I’d known Paul since both he and Jim were in junior high. In high school, Paul was the charmer, the yin to Jim’s yang, and while Paul made questionable choices, both were loyal friends for most of their adult lives. Paul was the last one to see Jim alive and the first one outside of the family to comfort Tracey in the aftermath. He’d played a fatherly surrogate to Will and helped Tracey through her grief. Yes, she deserved to find love again. But it didn’t make it any easier.

“Liz, did you hear that?” I said to the empty room. “Tracey’s getting married.”

I waited for the reply I knew wasn’t coming. Three years ago, my wife and Jim’s mom died of breast cancer. While we had all the best treatments, I think she secretly decided she wouldn’t fight as hard so that she could get back to her son. She didn’t say it in so many words, but Jim’s death affected her deeply. She never really got over it and I understood. I only wish she would have lived long enough to see Will grow up and our daughter Katie become a judge.

Speaking of Katie, at least she might have a similar shock to the system as me. I dialed her. I knew she’d be free. While I never dared dialed during court hours, I knew I could catch her in the evenings. Her spouse were her law books, and she spent more time in Lexus Nexis than on some dating sites.

“Hey Dad,” she said. “I suppose you’re calling about Tracey.”

I grunted. Tracey had already shared the news.

“Well, I think it’s great, don’t you?” she asked. “I mean Tracey deserves to be happy and Paul does that.”

“I know,” I said. “It’s just, well, you know.”

Katie gave a supportive sound but remained silent otherwise, goading me to elaborate on my feelings. She was a judge, not a therapist. Why did she do that to me?

“It just feels like she’s moving on,” I said finally.

“Of course she is. And that’s a good thing. It’s not like she’s forgetting Jim. She’s got a lot of life to live, and she needs companionship. And Paul brings that.”

“In my mind, I know. In my heart, well, it breaks.” Katie had a way of breaking through me. She was like her mother in that way. “In a way, I feel that we’re losing Tracey now too. I mean with Paul and his parents around, what does she need from me?”

“C’mon Dad, you know she will always need you. You’re always going to be her father-in-law. You’re always going to be Will’s grandfather. You’re not going to get lost in the shuffle.”

“But she left me a voicemail.”

“That’s a win. You didn’t get a text.”

“Thank god for that.”

As Katie promised, Tracey kept me in the loop on the plans, most of the time either calling me or stopping by with Paul and Will. I sometimes went over to her house for a Sunday dinner with Paul’s parents, sometimes with her own parents. In some ways, I felt like the odd man out, invited only as a courtesy. But then there’d be a moment when I would see Tracey look at me with love and I felt a part of something.

When the big day came, I was happy it was nothing near the wedding she had with Jim. There was no church nor the pomp and circumstance that marked memories of the occasion. Instead, it was a simple wedding at the Delta King, a decommissioned riverboat turned restaurant and hotel. I was honored that Katie and I were included as one of the fifty guests.

Katie stayed at my house that weekend. I was happy when she was a houseguest. It gave me some sense of normalcy and provided some activity, rather than me strategizing how I can space out meals to alternate leftovers without getting sick of spaghetti or burgers.

“That was a nice rehearsal dinner,” Katie said. “And it was nice for Paul’s parents to include us.”

I nodded. Zocalo was a little too loud. Even sitting at one end with Paul’s parents and Katie, we couldn’t hold a conversation. And understanding what Tracey, Will were laughing about with Paul and his crew were carrying on about on the other end? Forget about it. Instead, we just looked at each other and smiled as we ate.

On the wedding day, Katie helped me with my tie, and we drove to the Delta King. Old Town Sacramento can be a bit kitschy with its t-shirt shops, tattoo parlors, and bulk candy stores, but the Delta King was dressed appropriately for the situation. When we walked down the gangplank to board the boat, Will was there to greet us.

“Hello grandpa,” he said. His curly hair was combed and he was dressed in a dark blue suit and open collar. It was nice to have Paul select Will as his best man.

“You look more handsome every day,” Katie said.

I grabbed both shoulders, still scrawny, but I was overwhelmed by the man he was on the verge of becoming.

“With your hair like that, you look like your dad,” I said. I almost lost it right there. “Wow, you’re really growing into your features.”

“Thanks.” For one brief moment, Will forgot his ironic teenage smirk, and instead smiled broadly, truly appreciative of the compliment.

Paul came out with Rob, Jesse, and David. This was Jim’s crew. I remembered the five of them coming over for spaghetti on the night before a high school football game, or piling into David’s mom’s van to go camping, or dressing up to go to prom. And with Will standing with them, the image was complete.

It was the same scene as nearly twenty years when Tracey was marrying Jim. Though the location and the suits were different, and they all had aged since then, this group of friends were still bonded by decades of experiences and trials that brought them closer. Though they were missing Jim, they had endured.

“Mr. Jenson,” Paul said. “I’m so glad you’re here. Thank you for coming.”

I smiled. It was all I could do.

“We are so happy for you Paul,” Katie said, taking the lead. “And we’re honored you invited us.”

“Never a question,” Paul said. “We know who’s here as a joyous spirit. And it’s my honor to have you.”

Will led Katie and me to our seats. As best man, Will was the only person standing behind Paul as he exchanged vows with Tracey. I couldn’t take my eyes off Will and thinking of when my son vowed to love Tracey “until death do us part.” I was so lost in those decades' old memories, I almost missed David declaring Paul and Tracey as husband and wife.

I looked at the newlyweds. Tracey, dressed in a simple white knee-length dress, couldn’t stop looking at Paul with joy and friendship. I could tell that Jim would always be her true love, but Paul was her best friend and the one she wanted as her companion forever. Paul’s look was one of awe, as though he couldn’t believe his luck that she picked him. He looked at Tracey with adoration, with pure respect and there was nothing he wouldn’t do for her.

Finally, I stole a look at Will. He was happy and had made his own peace with the situation. I knew that Will was confused by their courtship, but now was fully on board. And if Will was good, then I could make that effort.

“Are you doing ok, Dad?” Katie asked as we stood up to cheer the happy couple. She wrapped her arm around mine.

“Just get through the reception,” I said and squeezed. “I see reminders of him everywhere and I tell you what - your mom would not do good with this.”

“She probably wouldn’t even get on the boat,” Katie laughed. “She’d be seasick on the dock.”

I laughed. Katie was right. Liz lost it all when I took the family fishing on a small boat in the middle of a calm lake. Liz had packed tuna sandwiches, and we hadn’t made it past the second hour before she was bent over the side of the boat.

Unlike Tracey’s first wedding, Paul and Tracey paid for this reception and did it right with a surf and turf combination dinner. They had a full open bar but the fact that no one took full advantage was a credit to their maturity. By the time the first clink of the glasses occurred, I had a couple of bourbons but wasn’t planning any more.

There were the toasts from Will, who did a fabulous job of course, and Tracey’s matron of honor, Julie. Tracey’s dad’s toast roasted Paul a bit about his ESPN and television career, his good looks, and his on-air catchphrases. We were almost to the dancing when one final chink of the glass chimed. It was Paul. He took the mic.

“I have one more toast,” Paul said. “Don’t worry. I cleared this with Tracey and Will and they both agreed wholeheartedly of the content. So don’t worry.”

The crowd gave a polite laugh.

“The last toast I want to give tonight is to a great man, Kevin Jensen.”

My eyes watered. Was this happening?

“Kevin, stand up.”

I looked over at Katie, tears were flowing down her face. She continued to clap and urged me to stand.

“Kevin, as many of you know is Will’s grandfather and father to the best friend many of us knew, Jim. I know that coming to this wedding has got to be the most difficult thing to do as it is a direct reminder of a tremendous loss we’ve all had to endure these past seven years.”

“But it is because of Jim that we are here. He’s the one who brought us all together. He was the one who made us all who we are today. He and Tracey brought us Will and that’s a reason to celebrate as it is.”

“So, I want to honor Kevin and his late wife Liz who raised the man who has been so important to all of our lives. I know I live each day trying to be the man he was and we all know he lives on in our hearts. To Kevin and Jim.”

I could hardly raise my glass, but when I did, I felt my son put a hand on my shoulder and give me strength. I knew he was with me. I knew he was ok with this, and he was happy.

And so was I.

Side of Mustard

The characters in this story are integral to my literary universe.

Jim, Paul, David, Jesse and Rob are all central to my first novel Friends In Low Places. Published in 2021. Friends in Low Places explores the evolution of lifelong friendships and how they withstand the strains of human failures. Friends in Low Places is a funny, poignant, sometimes heartbreaking portrayal of male relationships and the support they provide as boys mature into men.

In Lose Yourself, published in 2024, young Will is one of six characters featured in the interconnected narrative taking place at a singular baseball game. Attending the game with his future stepdad Paul, Will is faced with the conflicting emotions on moving on and being forgotten.

Both books are available for purchase at all online booksellers. You can also buy direct:

Lose Yourself

2024 Readers’ Favorite Book Award Winner, Honorable Mention

Published 2024 by OT Press

Friends in Low Places

Published 2021 by OT Press